By Shane Maher, Staff Writer
Have you ever wondered which one of your teachers was the best at doing quick 30 second doodles? Of course you haven’t, that’s ridiculous. I, however, always have, and this year I felt like I should finally answer that question. The task was fairly simple. All it required was going to my classes and asking my teachers to make a quick sketch on a Post-it.
Little did they know this wasn’t just some fun artsy story but almost a competition. I took these drawings and gave them to the queen of English, Ms. Tozzi. Featured below are her critiques on various staff members’ creative abilities.
“Ah. Mr. Castro — I can only guess that he was told to ‘draw something’ and he did — quite literally. More so — he included words in his drawing. As a proud nerd, I can tell you that Castro and I have had dozens of discussions over the years about words. How the words we hear and choose to repeat may frame the way we see the world. Learning multiple languages really opens doors to a variety of experiences that would be closed to us otherwise and of course we learn about ourselves and how we impact the conditions of our own lives and the lives of others. However, it looks like the hand is holding a pencil. I don’t like pencils.”
I score this 9 and a half estrellas.
“Well, well, well. Joe Dolan. I can’t tell exactly what is going on in this picture…leaving me to come up with my own story. Is it a fight? A dance? It kind of looks like West Side Story meets The Matrix — I dig it. And it is SO Joe Dolan — he totally values the stories people have to tell and helps kids find the voices they need to do so. Rock on!”
I rate this unlimited snaps!
Mrs. S. Costello
“Ugh. Stephannie Costello — why do you always have to be so chipper? It’s really messing with the dark, emo vibe some of us are cultivating. But…here you are with this flower…the embodiment of the beauty that exists in science and nature. Typical. Not only do you study awesome stuff and create awesome stuff, but you bring out the awesome in others.”
I rate this picture full of stamen and pistil.
“I’m sorry Ms. Jackson (I am for real, as Outkast would say.) Math brings me anxiety and I get a sweat mustache and teary eyes when I see numbers and letters mixed together. I am so very grateful there are people who understand such triangle drawings and even teach other people how to not fear math.”
I rate this drawing infinity times infinity squared.
“What is going on here, Jim Gill? I’m glad to see a smiling face on a teacher’s face– these masks certainly make me miss smiles. The money and the x in a corner must have something to do with Economics. Or the Red Sox. Either way I appreciate the enthusiasm.”
An all-star score for you!
“I’m looking at Mr. Cook’s tree and it — for some reason — reminds me of the tree from The Giving Tree by Shel Siverstein. The tree is generous of its resources — much like Mr. Cook. The book always perplexed me a bit because the tree never takes care of itself…just keeps giving until it’s a stump. I hope Mr. Cook is taking care of himself with plenty of water and sunlight.”
I rate this drawing: Full bushel of apples — honey crisp of course.
From this mini-project, “I think the takeaway is that some of my teachers are skilled at sketching.” It’s also evident that Ms. Tozzi has an obscure system of judgment, but I for one love it. It’s interesting to see how people like Mr. Gill and Ms. Jackson incorporated what they teach into their drawings. While others, “like Ms. Costello and Mr. Castro, ”Just flexed on all their competition in my opinion. Then there was Mr. Dolan’s, which was interesting. Thank you to all the teachers who participated in the project (and were somewhat lied to), and especially Queen Tozzi for her commentary and criticism.You all deserve “Infinity times infinity all-estrellas” just for participating.